Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you all SO much for tuning in on this fine and lovely day, right after the Holidays, to continue our series on social media. We, as authors, have been very busy, and due to this- went on a short hiatus to take care of those things with ~classiness~. As a high school student myself, I had finals, LEAP testing- as well as serving with my family members (older sister and mother) relating to widows, the homeless, youth, and so much more in the community. So, for all of you who have remained faithful, you are strongly appreciated! So, grab you a warm cup of hot chocolate (or coffee, or tea- we don’t discriminate here), pop some popcorn, and get ready for the ride.

We left off by stating the declarative fact that people run to technology (phones, computers, Ipads, etc.) and social media as a place of comfort (unhealthily). They simply do not know how to sit in a room, without any distractions, and enjoy the moment of what’s in front of them. This HAS to stop. We also described to you all how to stand firm in cyberbullying, but also mentioned the matter of fact that as long as you use social media, there will be cyberbullying somewhere. When you are firm in your faith and who you are in Christ, those things begin to not bother you, however, if they do, It is your choice to avoid the toxicity.

However, relating to the fact that Christmas was a week ago, and the Holidays just ended- I felt it would be necessary (and God has been laying on my heart to deal with this) to discuss comparison. Around Christmas time, you see ALL these people on Instagram, living their best lives- taking vacations to the Bahamas in their Ford truck(with a pretty little red bow on it) that they were just given for Christmas by their ~perfect~ partner who grants their every wish, and has this chiseled dad body, right? Or, you see someone who eats 15,000 calories a day and somehow doesn’t gain ANY weight. Then, you start to feel bad about yourself, don’t you? You start to “wish” your life was like theirs, don’t you? Well, firstly, I’m here to remind you that not everything you see on social media is real. As human beings, we all have problems, issues, and struggles. Of course, a person is not going to put that on display, on a large platform, for potentially hundreds (thousands or millions) of people to see. The main point of saying this is to convey to you that a person might seem to have the most beautiful, perfect, put-together life on the planet- yet be utterly miserable on the inside, and live a  dreadful life away from all the cameras.  

Secondly, relating to that idea, (and listen up closely with this) you’re not alone. Many people compare their lives, bodies, and habits to others on social media, though it’s not a healthy thing to do at all. Once you start to compare what you’ve been given by God, and contrast it with someone else’s (who has a COMPLETELY different calling), you immediately become ungrateful for the blessings that have been put in your life specifically. Not only this, but yet again, not everything on social media is REAL, and I stress that SO much. SO many people edit their lifestyles, and ESPECIALLY their bodies. Here are a few examples.

You see, I found a random picture online of someone who was photoshopped without their permission (or so it seems). Doesn’t the picture on the right look real? If you hadn’t seen a side-by-side comparison of these photos, I know some of you would think something along the lines of, “Oh wow! His skin is so smooth! I wish I had skin like that!” and would seriously fail to believe it was photoshopped. “Why is that?” you might be asking. It’s because humans have a tendency to desire things they don’t have, especially features that are adorned by society. However, we must be careful that we are not setting up standards for ourselves based on how the public eye views beauty. We’ve already established that society’s standards of beauty are deformed, non-human-like, deteriorated, and just plain SPOOKY. For all of you comparing your body to someone else on Youtube, Instagram, Facebook- or whatever else, this one is for YOU. ( For all you know, that person you’re comparing yourself to could have gotten some sort of medical procedure or plastic surgery and are posting “workout routines” on YouTube or Instagram to deceive people out of their money. It happens WAY more often than you think! MANY people aren’t open about their plastic surgeries. If Kim Kardashian was not open about her surgeries, and instead, said that she did “workout routines” to get where she is, I have no doubt some of you would believe her, and even defend her claims. )

I’m not going to comment on this one, because I’m SURE you see how realistic this could be, when in reality- she was already pretty before!

👀👀

Someone without full comprehension (no offense, but someone very young) could look at these photos, think they’re real, and begin to feel very insecure (and self-hateful) due to these things. This very fact is the danger behind comparison, and the desire to be “perfect” on social media.

Here’s a pretty fun one:

I just thought that one was pretty cool (don’t judge me), although, it does further support my point. You never know what’s going on, on the other side of a screen- so don’t automatically begin to compare and contrast your life with someone else’s, who has struggles (just like you do) and is human, just like you are.

Moving onto my third point, which is that Comparison is a joy-crusher, and a thief of it at that. As I previously stated, when you compare your life to someone else, you completely disregard the Blessings in front of you, and become ungrateful for them (which is a very dangerous place to be in mentally and emotionally). (Now, you can admire something and use it as inspiration, though that is completely different from comparison- which could potentially lead to you attempting to degrade someone else in order for you to feel better about yourself. I’m not saying everyone does that, though a lot of people do.) Not only this, but comparison is often rooted in jealousy. The emotion jealousy, as you know, creates spurs of anger. Anger is a joy-stealer, and therefore, so is comparison.  (Just so you know, I’ve personally dealt with this myself- which is why I’m able to give advice on this topic.) Overall, comparison puts you in a very unhealthy state of mind, and it’s not worth the not only emotional, but mental and physical toll it takes on you.

Fourth point: Fight against comparison. When you catch yourself comparing your life, gifts, or talents to another person’s, catch yourself, and stop it in its tracks. Remember that God has given you what he has given you for a reason, and if he wanted you to be someone else, he would have made you to be that person. However, you’re not, right (I sure hope not)? You were placed in your family, in your life, in this time period, in your skin tone, with the hair texture you have, along with the shape of both your nose and your eyes, for a reason. Don’t disregard that simply because it’s not what the person next to you has. You are beautifully and wonderfully made, so don’t let anyone make you feel otherwise.

How about I give an example that would help you better (I’ve personally heard this before)? Let’s say you, and another young lady (or gentlemen) are in a baking contest. You cook a chocolate raspberry cake (topped with a whipped cream garnish), and she/he whips up a nice lemon cheesecake, with lemon extract along the lines of the cake (as you can most likely tell, I’m a bit hungry right now). Just because your “component” made a different kind of cake, doesn’t mean yours won’t taste good as well. God has you in the season that he has you in for a reason, as we’re all in different seasons of our lives. It simply means your component took on a different kind of cake, in a completely different arena (which is fully okay). Know that just because another person is beautiful, does not mean you can’t be as well. God has given each of us unique talents, languages, appearances, ways of expressing ourselves, etc. Wouldn’t a world where everyone looks and acts fully the same be so dreadfully boring? The point I’m getting to is to accept what God has given you that makes you unique, and don’t try to degrade that to make anyone feel more “comfortable” or to conform to an unrealistic standard that society sets through social media. Now, I won’t keep you long, since this is our last blog of 2023. 

Therefore,

Going into 2024, I charge you with this: Do not be so “engulfed” by the danger of comparison that you miss out on the very Blessings God has put in your life. Whether that be your family, your friends, your recipes, your children, or whoever else- do not take for granted what has been placed for you to relish. I assure you- you do NOT want to be held in bondage emotionally, mentally, or physically by the thief of joy (comparison), and you surely do NOT want to go into 2024 with it. Let this be your sign to let the bad habit of comparison go, and be freed from it. Considering this is our last blog of the year, carry this message with you into 2024. I pray that it will be daily reminder for both those of you who struggle with this topic, and those of you who don’t. Merry (late) Christmas, Happy New Year (enjoy it!), and we’ll see you in 2024!

Proverbs 24:19: “Do not fret because of evildoers or be envious of the wicked”.

Psalm 37: “Never envy the wicked! Soon they fade away like grass and disappear”.

Proverbs 24:1-2- “Do not envy the wicked, do not desire their company; for their hearts plot violence, and their lips talk about making trouble.”

Galatians 6:4-10″Don’t compare yourself with others. Just look at your own work to see if you have done anything to be proud of.”

To be continued….